Rambly Ramble.

I wish that I didn’t get so distracted by the things in my life.  When there is so much going on in my life, it is easy for me to forget, to be distracted.  I have noticed that when I drift from my Father, unintentionally or intentionally, there seems a heavier burden I bare.  It’s true; when He’s not first and foremost in my life there are many things I cannot handle well.

Why do I ever stop leaning on Him? What the hell is my problem? I don’t get this! Why am I stupid concerning this part of my life? The MOST IMPORTANT PART! I don’t know.  All I do know is that I have to get it out and somehow I have to learn.  I have to do it NOW. It simply cannot wait another moment!

I’m drowning.  I’m drowning in the freedom to choose Him.  The option to spend time in His presence.  Yet, I have chosen to spend more time doing schoolwork, time reading Facebook, time doing anything other than concentrating on my relationship with the Father.

God, help me to be in a place where I thirst after Your righteousness and seek to spend more time with You.  Help me to put our relationship before all others.  It feels like I”m always asking You for things, but I want to be a giver too. I want to give all that I am to You.


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